Med school journal

My my my… what to type, what to leave out, what’s fun and what’s just absolutely depressing. I don’t know, I can’t choose. I hate it here. I must have said in one of my previous posts that i was looking forward to some free time this semester, well I ate my words and they were bitter to say the least.

This the second semester of the fourth year that is one year away from finishing undergrad has me by the throat. We have about 3 course units which must sound great until it is discovered that one of those three has 5 in it (yes 5) tears, anguish, despair and they do not connect, at all (Dermatology, HIV, TB, Oncology and Palliative care) okay maybe the last two, somehow. The rotations were both rapid and depressing, each lasted ONE WEEK, 12 hour days not including the zoom/ physical lectures which for the most part were at night. Those five weeks drained the willingness to persevere out of me. I was promised the most relaxed rotation out of the last 3 years, I’m ready to sue.

On the other hand, I am indeed one step closer to the end, it wasn’t all bad and I have seen some new things that got me thinking a little bit more about life (and appreciating it) so I’m glad there’s that.

We once again have to return to the sites we went to last year (urgh!!) to “implement” what we have not yet figured out, we shall have no Christmas or New Year’s break because, you know, doctors don’t rest or something and that is how a very biased and exhausted me has finally found time to give a short (whiny) summary of the last 2 – 3 months.

Is Australia accepting baby doctor immigrants? I’m very hardworking I promise.

Hold me back

Some nights I dream and I see myself as never before

In the middle of the night I see I can be all I think I can be

But in the bright light of day my flaws glare back at me

And I can pretend no longer

Those dreams turn to vapour from the heat

Of expectations and failure

Of fear and never feeling good enough,

I allow the dark to let me dream

and the light to hold me back.

 

I feel, sometimes, that nothing else holds us back as much as we do. When i started this blog, i thought it would fail and end up being read by only me (look where that got me), then i came up with ideas that didn’t get the response i hoped and i gave up (as usual) because i felt like a failure and that led me to abandoning this blog for a while, i just needed to regroup (or so i said) but here i am once again battling my inner demons. Welcome to all the new additions!

Return

I seem to have forgotten I had a WordPress blog. How terrible of me.

When she lost herself time and time again

Only one thing had the power to return her to herself

It was the fear of the unknown, the fear of not knowing what could have been

Had she not surrendered the weight of what if she fails.

Matthew Gibson, fitnessreview234, medniche and 𝑀𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑖𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑀𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑠𝑒𝑡, welcome ✨

Storm

Storm

Watch

Watch

Confessions of a fanatic weight watcher

Now that the harder semester (and it’s papers) is finally done 🎊🎊 here comes my continuation of get fit and healthy and buy a bikini even if I can’t swim (yay). This time, I want to put more focus on learning some cool new recipes because I feel like a real switch in my diet would really benefit me while giving me great tasty food too.

If you have some simple healthy and delicious recipes you think I should try starting Monday, don’t be afraid to share✨

Abide

I’ve seen young life with so much hope perish into ashes

Old life take it’s memories away erasing the last trails of an era

A sad life at the end of it’s tether snappped in two with a lot of pain and anguish,

A happy life brought to a stand still leaving many lost,

But I wake and give thanks to see I’m whole each morning because you’d never know the day.

May, priyeshbanerjeept, maxiglobal5 and sawphd, welcome ✨

I’m reading a sad book, can you tell😅

LITTLE GIRL

Little girl, the world saw your dream and said,

We shall watch her and see what she does

With the gifts we’ve given

And so she listened and she did,

She made manifest what she dared to dream.

Natural Bodybuilding Zone, HEALTH and NUTRITION and alkalinediettips welcome ✨

Apparently, we are 500 strong 🎊! Someone pinch me. In whatever way you’ve helped my blog (reading (web,app, email, wherever), liking, commenting, following thank you. I’m away at the moment (papers) but hope to be back soon and hopefully better!

🏵️

Apocalypse

And then suddenly it feels like

The end of everything

When tempers and memories short circuit

Palms sweat and temples throb

In that moment I hope you remember to breathe.

Cookingarc, welcome ✨

Create

I hold the magic in me

In my hands to create a world that needs no words

And in my words to create a place that is yet to exist

This poem was much longer in my dreams last night, maybe it will come back to me.

YummyHood.com, Wanderlustarc, webmark184, martiphypro,Rosanna M Nadeau, PCELC, beforeyoubuystorecom, theketodietnewssite, Mya and Feed Your Buzz, welcome ✨